Tag Archives: awesome

Godzilla vs. Destoroyah (1995)

Battlin' beasts!
Battlin’ beasts!
Godzilla doing what he does best: wrecking stuff!
Godzilla doing what he does best: wrecking stuff!

Starring Takurô Tatsumi, Yôko Ishino, Yasufumi Hayashi and Megumi Odaka. Written by Kazuki Ômori. Directed by Takao Okawara. Produced by Shogo Tomiyama and Tomoyuki Tanaka for Toho.  

Will the human protagonists be able to help out?
Will the human protagonists be able to make a difference?

Godzilla is on the verge of a nuclear meltdown and the Japanese defence forces try to freeze the great beast, in an attempt to cool down his rocketing temperature. But there’s another big problem… a mega-monster known as Destoroyah… 

Big G is overheating!
Big G is overheating!

GODZILLA VS. DESTOROYAH was the final Toho Godzilla movie of the Heisei era (this era spanned the years from 1984 to 1995).

Steam rises off the super-heated reptile!
Steam rises off the super-heated uber-beast!

Directed by Takao Okawara (who also directed GODZILLA 2000, GODZILLA VS. SPACEGODZILLA, GODZILLA VS. MOTHRA and GODZILLA VS MECHAGODZILLA II), with a script written by Kazuki Omori and special effects by Koichi Kawakita, this film begins memorably with Godzilla, who is coated in hot, glowing, lava-esque rashes, going on a wrecking spree in Hong Kong.

The rampant radioactive reptile stomps through Hong Kong!
The rampant radioactive reptile stomps through Hong Kong!

It is revealed that Godzilla’s internal nuclear fission processes are going so haywire it seems that Big G is threatening to explode… which is a disaster that could destroy the world. If this wasn’t bad enough, as already mentioned, another monster appears: a creature that is a conglomeration of masses of crustaceans that were mutated by the Oxygen Destroyer weapon used to kill the very first Godzilla back in 1954.

Roar!
Roaring kaiju!
The winged form of Destoroyah
The winged form of Destoroyah

Destoroyah is a novel, nasty kaiju, becoming a massive beast with a large, central head-horn, glowing orange eyes, big tusks projecting from its face, huge shoulder horns and massive wings!


The monsters have a face-off
The monsters have a face-off

Godzilla bests this great beast, which has killed Big G’s son, Godzilla Junior… but Destoroyah returns to fight again, in the guise of a swarm of multiple-legged mini-Destoroyahs! Even after Godzilla wipes out these things, Destoroyah returns yet again in winged form!

Japanese poster
Japanese poster

But Destoroyah is eventually killed and the terminally overheating Godzilla stands alone, dying… so the Japanese defence forces desperately shoot cryo-lasers and fire coolant-projectiles to prevent a full-on meltdown. As an Akira Ifukube theme, reworked with choral voices, plays on the soundtrack, Godzilla roars while his flesh falls off him and he decays… and the human characters watch on as radiation levels rapidly reduce… …and the camera moves through the smoke and steam and there, backlit, is Godzilla Junior, who has been brought back to life by his dying father’s energies, and has rapidly matured, ready to take on the role of king of the monsters. This is truly the most emotional moment in Godzilla history! I’m wiping away a tear as I write about it! 

Bye bye big buddy
Bye bye big buddy

This was an awesome way to end the Heisei-era Godzilla series, with a very memorable-looking Godzilla, who is in pain much of the time, glowing with uncontrollable inner-heat, emitting steam, bleeding lava, his back-plates flickering erratically. In many scenes the water actually boils all around him as he strides through the sea. Great stuff!

Finally, let’s check out an amazing poster by the late, great Japanese artist Noriyoshi Ohrai. Here Noriyoshi ensures that the image of the terminally overheating ‘burning Godzilla’ is centred in the painting, with Godzilla Junior positioned in front of him, hinting at what happens during the movie’s finale…

This is a terrific poster!
This is a terrific poster!

Rising Boas in a Girl’s School (2022)

The main giant serpent attacks security guards!
The main giant serpent attacks security guards!

Starring Zheng Long, Peng Bo, Shi Xuanru, Pang Yong and Cao Tiankai. Written by Xie Wenjun, directed by Guo Yulong and Xie Wenjun. Produced by Li Shi.

Cool bit of promotional art
Cool bit of promotional art

A ginormous snake escapes from a snake farm (that’d been using illegal growth hormones in its feed to breed larger reptiles for its snakeskin handbag business) and slinks down to the nearby Haixi Flight Attendant Aviation College, where it runs amok, accompanied by masses of regular-sized, aggressive serpents. A valiant security guard (Long) and a feisty student (Bo) team-up to help a group of survivors holed up in the college buildings live through the ordeal.

The huge snake claims another victim!
The huge snake claims another victim!

This film should technically have been called ‘Rising Boas in a Flight Attendant Aviation College’, but I guess that title was far less punchy! Setting this film in this location does provide the filmmakers with an excuse to show droves of screaming female students, wearing figure-hugging white skirts and light blue blouses, clattering around in their high heels, as the huge snake rampages about the college, in scenes that really ramp up the movie’s cheesy fun factor.

A film that mixes killer snakes with student flight attendants!
A film that mixes killer snakes with student flight attendants!
Stampeding student stewardesses!
Stampeding student stewardesses!

Some girls and their teachers get gobbled up, then the story transitions into the siege-focused part of the plot. Despite a title that Freud would have salivated over, the film steers away from showing anything too lascivious, contenting itself with an occasional shot of, say, a small snake slithering from a dead student’s skirt or the scene where a snake crawls over an underdressed character whilst she’s in the middle of indulging in some blindfolded foreplay with her boyfriend. But none of this is as exploitative as the sweaty promotional art, which seems to promise something more risqué. There’s nothing here that reaches the delirious, manic, mondo heights of 80s Hong Kong schlock-fest CALAMITY OF SNAKES, for instance.

Boas like bras?
Boas like bras?

A sequence with the guard hero hanging from cables strung between two buildings, with the mega-snake curled up below him and two smaller snakes making their way along the cables, is well-handled, with special effects that are on a par with the kind of FX seen in similar flicks.

A variation on one of the promotional images
A variation on one of the promotional images
The massive boa looks quite good in some of its scenes
The massive boa looks quite good in some of its scenes

By the midpoint the film tries to become a little more serious, as more people get picked off and squabbles break out amongst the survivors. There’s a pause in the action to allow an elitist, selfish student to be lectured about the importance of working people, in a speech bound to please the Chinese Communist Party censors, and then the fun stuff kicks back into gear as the huge snake launches another attack.

Nom, nom, nom...
Nom, nom, nom…

The guard protagonist has a moment of self-doubt (heroes in these movies often do), but he’s soon taking part in an enjoyable finale that sees the survivors tooling themselves up with homemade fireworks-bazookas. This extended showdown, ending with the recently-eaten security guard somehow surviving and crawling back out of the dead snake’s mouth, helps make this movie mindlessly marvellous in its own trashy, limited way, but it would’ve been far better if it had retained the silly, kitsch vibe of the first act.

The survivors use 'fireworks-bazookas' during the finale!
The survivors use ‘fireworks-bazookas’ during the finale!

One last look at the mega-snake…

Super-sized snake on the prowl!
Super-sized snake on the prowl!

Project Wolf Hunting (2022)

Lots of fighting!
Lots of fighting!

Starring Seo In-guk, Jang Dong-yoon, Choi Gwi-hwa, Sung Dong-il, Park Ho-san, Jung Moon-sung and Jung So-min. Written by Kim Hong-sun, directed by Kim Hong-sun, and produced by Gu Seong-mok.
Cheum Film/Contents G

Guns!
Guns!

More guns!
More guns!

Wow! This is a really visceral, cool & bloody action-horror-sci-fi flick!

Lots of blood!
Lots of blood!

A group of South Korean prisoners are transported from the Philippines in the cargo ship Frontier Titan, overseen by a large team of Korean police officers, led by Seok-woo (Ho-san). The  surly cons are kept in line by the cops, but it all gets very bloody as a murderous team takes over the vessel, the prisoners are freed, and then an unstoppable being escapes from his restraints in the bowels of the ship…

Poster
Poster
There's a lot of stabbing in this flick
There’s a lot of stabbing in this flick
Just to reiterate: this ultra-violent flick is fond of knifings (and shootings, bludgeonings, etc)!

The start of PROJECT WOLF HUNTING is paced nicely, showing us around the ship and introducing the cops, the cons and the ship’s crew members. But soon the killings start and we’re left in no doubt that director Kim Hong-sun intends to deliver a non-stop, blood-drenched, action-filled movie where the visceral, violent aspects of the story take precedence over the plotting and characterisations. This approach has been criticised by some reviewers, but I appreciate Hong-sun’s commitment to making such a no-holds-barred production where the brutal carnage and action is the whole point of the movie. And, anyway, this isn’t to say that the characters are blandly sketched, because the director still manages to imbue many of the bad guys with a warped, sick charisma, especially the tattooed psycho Jong-du (In-guk) and the ruthless, machine gun-toting inside man Kim Gyu-tae (Moon-sung).

Kim is a cold-blooded killer, like many of the other characters!
Kim is a cold-blooded killer, like many of the other characters!

When the superhuman killing machine Alpha (Gwi-hwa) begins his murder spree at the midpoint, the carnage intensifies. Alpha, who has swollen flesh around his eyes that are sewn shut with outsized staples, stomps loudly about the ship like a part-zombie terminator. This monstrous dude cannot be reasoned with and is revealed to be a lobotomised human weapon test subject for the Kemono Project, a Japanese-run experiment dating back to the Second World War. We’re even treated to a flashback that shows Alpha bludgeoning a team of Japanese soldiers to death with a human skull!

Alpha is initially in storage below deck...
Alpha is initially in storage below deck…
...but once the zombie-like Alpha awakens he really goes on a killing spree!
…but once the zombie-like Alpha awakens he really goes on a killing spree!

An extra layer of complication is added for the surviving cops (and several ‘nice’ cons) when it’s divulged that the pharma company Aeon Genetics is behind the presence of Alpha on the ship: they’d been bringing Alpha to South Korea to find out why he doesn’t age. With chaos reigning on the cargo vessel, Aeon flies in a helicopter full of mercs, but these all end up dying in grisly ways too, just like most of the cast.

This isn't merely 'a super soldier extravaganza', it is an 'extraordinarily gory super soldier extravaganza'!
This isn’t merely ‘a super soldier extravaganza’, it is an ‘extraordinarily gory super soldier extravaganza’!

In a film where various characters are revealed to be the super-powered results of experimentation, arterial blood-jets go off like lawn sprinklers, and heads get caved-in on a regular basis, this well-shot, ultra-violent sci-fi-horror-actioner keeps you constantly guessing as to which characters might stand a chance of surviving until the end of a movie that’s awash with puddles, squirts, rivulets and torrents of blood. In case you didn’t know already: I think this flick is bloody ace!

This scene doesn't end well for all the Japanese characters!
This scene doesn’t end well for all the Japanese characters!

Alright then, one more shot from the movie…

Seo In-guk, as a tattooed psycho-killer, kills yet another victim!
Seo In-guk, as a tattooed psycho-killer, knifes yet another victim!

Sputnik (2020)

The alien is an interesting design
The alien is an interesting design

Starring Oksana Akinshina, Fedor Bondarchuk, Pyotr Fyodorov and Anton Vasilev. Written by Oleg Malovichko and Andrey Zolotarev. Directed by Egor Abramenko.

That's a rather bloody helmet
That’s a rather bloody helmet

In 1980s Russia an independently-minded doctor, Tatyana Klimova (Akinshina), is taken to a military base to help with research focusing on a cosmonaut, Konstantin Veshnyakov (Fyodorov), who has formed a symbiotic bond with a cortisol-consuming alien creature living inside him. Tatyana discovers that the alien can exit its host to feed on live human victims provided by the military authorities. Horrified by this revelation, Tatyana sets out to help Konstantin… but is the cosmonaut complicit in what happens to the victims?

The alien is a funny-lookin' bugger
The alien is a funny-lookin’ bugger

First of all, you shouldn’t go into this Russian film thinking that it’s going to be a full-on sci-fi-horror flick like ALIEN. This is not a monster-on-the-loose film: it focuses more on the unravelling of what the link is between alien and host, what the military are actually planning to do, how the relationships evolve between the main characters, and so on.

The extraterrestrial has got a whole bunch of eyes
The extraterrestrial has got a whole bunch of eyes

But don’t worry, you do get alien attack scenes too!

I really enjoyed the movie, which is handled expertly by first-time director Egor Abramenko. The musical score, by Oleg Karpachev, is very good too, adding to the tension.

A leaping, long-legged critter!
A leaping, long-limbed critter!

SPUTNIK is definitely worth a watch, with a story that works really well, with interesting reveals happening as the plot progresses.

'Man has a new inhabitant'
‘Man has a new inhabitant’
It's a nasty little critter
It’s a nasty little beastie

Squirm (1976)

Worm-face!
Worm-face!
Arrow Video Blu-ray cover
Arrow Video Blu-ray cover

Starring Don Scardino, Patricia Pearcy, R.A. Dow, Jean Sullivan and Peter MacLean. Written and directed by Jeff Lieberman. Produced by Samuel Z. Arkoff, Joseph Beruh, Edgar Lansbury and George Manasse.

Lobby card
Lobby card

Downed power lines in Georgia turn bloodworms into killer critters that begin to chow down on the local rednecks!

He's full of worms!
He’s full of worms!
US one sheet
US one sheet
Japanese VHS sleeve
Japanese VHS sleeve

SQUIRM is a cool example of the 70s trend for eco-horror/animal attack movies. The two young leads (Scardino & Pearcy) are likeable and, between the worm scenes, they try to figure out the identity of a missing skeleton in a SCOOBY-DOO-style mystery-solving fashion.

Worm-alanche!
Worm-alanche!

There are lots of shots of real bloodworms, which look gross when filmed close-up: they really do resemble mini-monsters! In this movie these worms scream too! Yes! Screaming worms! And they like to dangle from the shower as well!

They're in the shower!
They’re in the shower!

There’s some fine early makeup work by Rick Baker to look out for (and Rob Bottin was an uncredited assistant makeup artist on this production too). The ‘worm-face’ scene is great, revelling in shots of a character who has bloodworms crawling beneath the skin of his face! He yanks at the worms, trying to pull them out! These are really neat-looking practical effects! Rick Baker really shows here that he was a makeup effects expert worth keeping an eye on.

Bloodworms beneath his skin!
Bloodworms beneath his skin!
Wigglin' worms!
Wigglin’ worms!

The ending is a nice merging of creepy house thriller & critter attack genres. It’s during this finale that the film comes up with its most impactful image; a man becoming submerged in a sea of worms that fill the room! If you don’t like worms you will not like this scene (or the movie)!

Lobby card
Lobby card

This is an enjoyable, wriggly, writhing, creepy-crawly, low budget, well-handled creatures-run-amok B movie that keeps you entertained throughout: it’s squirm-tastic!

Here are some posters…

UK quad poster. Art by John Stockle 
UK quad poster. Art by John Stockle 
Australian daybill
Australian daybill poster
US half sheet
US half sheet poster
Italian poster
Italian poster
German one sheet poster
German one sheet poster
A proposed design for a UK poster
A proposed design for a UK poster by artist Vic Fair
A second proposed design for a UK poster by artist Vic Fair. The actual UK SQUIRM poster was finally drawn by John Stockle
A second proposed design for a UK poster by artist Vic Fair. The actual UK SQUIRM poster was finally drawn by John Stockle
Japanese poster
Japanese poster

French poster
French poster

Let’s finish with a close-up shot of one of the bloodworms…

Yuck!
Yuck!

Riddick (2013)

Watch out for the monster's pincer-tail, Riddick!
Watch out for the monster’s pincer-tail, Riddick!

Starring Vin Diesel, Jordi Mollà, Matt Nable, Katee Sackhoff, Dave Bautista, Bokeem Woodbine and Conrad Pla. Written and directed by David Twohy. One Race Productions/Riddick Canada Productions/Radar Pictures.

'Survival is his revenge'
‘Survival is his revenge’

Hard-as-nails macho future warrior Riddick finds himself stranded on a wild, sun-scorched planet, so he is forced to trigger an emergency beacon that attracts two teams of mercenaries, who land on the planet and begin to hunt him. As if taking on these mercs isn’t enough, it starts to rain, and within the wet weather lurk monsters that would really love to eat Riddick!

Eye of the beast
Eye of the beast
Dave Bautista is one of the space mercs
Dave Bautista is one of the space mercs

PITCH BLACK (2000) was a very enjoyable, violent sc-fi-action-monster movie that introduced the world to badass antihero Riddick (a character created by Jim Wheat and Ken Wheat), played to perfection by Vin Diesel. The follow-up flick, THE CHRONICLES OF RIDDICK (2004), wasn’t to my taste. I found it too overblown and sprawling, desperate to be more of an ‘epic’ sci-fi blockbuster. This third film, RIDDICK, is much better, in my opinion, maybe because it tones down the pompous fantasy-science fiction elements of part 2 and concentrates on telling a survival-on-a-creature-filled-planet story, just like the first film. You could certainly argue that RIDDICK’s central concept is very similar to PITCH BLACK’s core plot: one has alien beasties that only come out in the dark, and the other has alien beasties that only come out when it rains. But, hey, I like this monsters-in-the-downpour concept, so let’s move on…

The monsters close-in...
The monsters close-in…

RIDDICK really delivers lots of creature action! Perhaps this movie’s world is a little green screen-ish compared to the real locations used in PITCH BLACK, but this movie does boast a fun bunch of critters!

The creatures come in all sizes
The creatures come in all sizes

There’s loads of fun stuff to see here, including pincer-tailed Mud Demon predators, hyena-like dog creatures, flying bird-reptiles and eels that live in tepid pools of water. I love the bit where Riddick disembowels a big Mud Demon… which proceeds to eat its own guts!


A winged critter
A winged critter
Riddick slides beneath the big Mud Demon, ready to slit open its guts with his bone-mounted blade weapon!
Riddick slides beneath the big Mud Demon, ready to slit open its guts with his bone-mounted blade weapon!

It was a nice touch having Riddick befriend one of the alien dog creatures. Cool!

Riddick and an alien hyena-dog
Riddick and an alien hyena-dog
I liked the alien hound!
I liked the alien hound!

There’s a last stand-style battle between Riddick and the Mud Demons on a rock outcrop that is also pretty damn cool: it’s almost like a Conan the Barbarian moment! Niiiiiiiiiice.

The last stand moment atop a rocky outcrop
The last stand moment atop a rocky outcrop

Finally, here are some creature concepts…

The original design for the Mud Demon was done by Patrick Tatopoulos, then Jerad S. Marantz took a pass at the creatures, modelling them in Z brush.

Full body view of Mud Demon, seen from different angles
Full body view of the Mud Demon design, seen from different angles
Mud Demon head design
Mud Demon head design
Front view
Front view
Designs for the Mud Demon pincer-tipped tail!
Designs for the Mud Demon pincer-tipped tail!
A colour rendering of a Mud Demon
A colour rendering of a Mud Demon

Jurassic Revival (2022)

Armed team members shoot at the massive snake!
Armed team members shoot at the massive snake!

Starring Ma Xinyu, Feng Qilong, Yang Qiyu, Shen Yunzhong and Qiao Yaona, written by Li Wei, directed by Zhao Cong and produced by Xu Yawei.

Okay, I know I often say this, but here I go again: If only the movie was as good as this promo artwork
Okay, I know I often say this, but here I go again: If only the movie was as good as this promo artwork!

This begins in the 1980s, on a newly-discovered island (the ghost island), where we see a T-Rex attack the researchers and guards at an encampment. Loads of bullets are fired at this T-Rex, but it keeps on attacking, and even dynamite does little to slow it down. One particular scientist is shown running about, clutching a dinosaur egg, and then the story skips to the present day (as stories often do in these flicks), and we’re introduced to Zhao (Xinyu), the daughter of the guy-with-the-egg seen in the prologue. Zhao is asked by the despicable Mr Du (Qiyu) to accompany him and his team on a new mission to ghost island, the location of which he has rediscovered by comparing cloud formations on photographs taken at different times (a rip-off of an idea used in the 1976 version of KING KONG). Against her better judgement, Zhao goes with Mr Du and his armed goons to the island. Other team members include Laka, a dreadlocked demolition expert, Sangji, a survival expert, and Yuzi, an attractive, stony-faced, gun-toting she-merc who likes to wear snug-fitting shorts.

Yuzi doesn't like to smile
Yuzi doesn’t like to smile

Once on ghost island, a member of the group coughs-up blood and dies after a bug flies into his mouth (but these wasp-like bugs are never encountered again), and then a super-gigantic cobra goes on the offensive (of course there’s a huge snake in this movie: Chinese creature features just LOVE to include giant snakes if they get the chance!)

Giant cobra!
Giant cobra!
A close-up shot of the serpent!
A close-up shot of the serpent!

The team are unable to kill this huge serpent with all their firepower, and are fortunately saved when a carnosaur rocks up and quickly bites the cobra in two! The team get away from the reddish-brown predatory dino, which will turn up again later. 

The big cobra and the huge carnosaur roar at each other!
The big cobra and the huge carnosaur roar at each other!

An encounter with Velociraptors in an area of long grass happens next, and it is handled pretty well. There’s even a decent-looking full scale raptor prop head used in this sequence, as well as a full-body raptor costume.

The practical effects raptor head looks pretty damn good
The practical effects raptor head looks pretty damn good

The characters eventually reach the island’s open plains, which is populated by Stegosaurs, Triceratops, sauropods, pterosaurs, and other dinos.

Dinos roam the open plains
Dinos roam the open plains

All dinosaur movies should include shots of a big skeleton at some point. This movie does just that, so I am pleased!
All dinosaur movies should include shots of a big skeleton at some point. This movie does just that, so I am pleased!

The quality of the special effects does vary throughout the film, with some of it looking particularly weak. One such example of low quality FX is the reddish-brown carnivore (which we saw kill the cobra earlier) that now reenters the story. This critter moves about with a clunky, awkward gait that is not of a very high standard, effects-wise. But a T-Rex that shows up at this point, with Zhao’s wild-haired father riding on its back, is a better example of the CGI, boasting a more impactful body design and good skin texture details. It turns out that Zhao’s dad has raised this T-Rex from the egg he was carrying about, and now the dino is his loyal pet! This is a fun, goofy idea, but the filmmakers waste the opportunity to show lots of dino-riding action, and simply have the dad tell the T-Rex to chill out while he joins the team, as Mr Du searches for a special meteorite.

The wild-haired father's pet T-Rex is hurt after a fight...
The wild-haired father’s pet T-Rex is hurt after a fight with the reddish-brown carnosaur…
...but it gets back up
…but it gets back up: the pet T-Rex is okay, folks! Yay!

The explorers reach a hot, volcanic landscape, dotted with jets of flame, which is the location of the meteorite. Mr Du wants to blow this hunk of rock up (presumably because it contains valuable minerals), but Zhao’s father says that the meteorite’s magnetic field is related to the life of the entire island, so if the rock gets destroyed every living thing on the isle will perish. So, after a raptor attack, the team members inevitably split into two factions, as some try to protect the meteorite, and others attempt to blow it up. 

Raptors in the volcanic zone
Raptors in the volcanic zone

The orange-hued, fiery zone, where this finale takes place, is quite stylised and theatrical-looking, exuding a more fantastical, cinematic vibe (compared to the naturalistic locations used elsewhere), and it definitely suits the pulpy requirements of this lost world film. So it’s a shame that it is used as the setting for a protracted hostage standoff situation, with Mr Du holding Zhao at knifepoint, which is all rather anticlimactic. We do get to see the pet T-Rex again, though, at the very end, as the survivors wait on the beach to be rescued.  

Chillin' on the beach with the pet T-Rex
Chillin’ on the beach with the pet T-Rex

As the film fades to black, some copy informs us that Laka, Zhao and Sangji were sentenced to six years in prison for breaking the local law. But could someone please answer this question for me: how the hell does a lost, prehistoric island happen to have its own local law?!

Chinese monster movies like to include Asian Lara Croft-types in their stories!
Chinese monster movies like to include Asian Lara Croft-types in their stories!

Sea Fever (2019)

The eyeless corpse of an infected crew member
The eyeless corpse of an infected crew member

Starring Hermione Corfield, Dag Malmberg, Jack Hickey, Olwen Fouéré, Dougray Scott and Connie Nielsen. Written and directed by Neasa Hardiman. Bright Moving Pictures/Creativity Capital/Epic Pictures Group.

Poster
Poster
Hermione Corfield stands out as lead character Siobhan
Hermione Corfield stands out as lead character Siobhan

Siobhan (Corfield), a science student, gets a place on a fishing trawler that is overseen by Freya (Nielsen) and her husband, Gerard (Scott). As the trawler sets off, the Irish Coast Guard alerts the crew, informing them that their planned fishing destination is in an exclusion zone. However, despite Freya’s orders not to go there, Gerard takes the trawler into the zone anyway, because he needs a big haul of fish to keep ownership of the ship. But there’s something lurking within the exclusion zone that ain’t no fish…

The trawler sets off on its fateful voyage
The trawler sets off on its fateful voyage

This seaborne sci-fi-horror movie features a vast, strange creature that infects the crew. This infection actually turns out to be part of the critter’s lifecycle… and it can cause the eyeballs of victims to explode!

Be careful, dudes, your eyes might burst!
Be careful, dudes, your eyes might burst!

This is a pretty decent production, but the movie gets bogged down with the main protagonist, who is played well by Hermione Corfield, trying to identify and isolate the infection. The plot should really have delved more into the beast’s whole lifecycle, showing us what the various stages of this glowing, jellyfish-like critter look like. But, that aside, SEA FEVER is definitely a solid, well-acted, well-made, modestly-sized dark sci-fi flick.

Glowing appendages!
Glowing appendages!
The bioluminescent tentacle-appendages attach themselves to the ship's hull with suckers...
The bioluminescent tentacle-appendages attach themselves to the ship’s hull with suckers…
...and the appendages exude a slimy substance that eats through the wooden hull, ready to begin a cycle of infection
…and the appendages exude a slimy substance that eats through the wooden hull, ready to begin a cycle of infection

Hey, SEA FEVER features parasites swimming in people’s eyes and includes shots of bioluminescent tentacles, so of course it’s worth a watch!

Just what is this thing?
Just what is this thing?
Turkish poster
Turkish poster
South Korean poster
South Korean poster
Russian poster
Russian poster
This film ain't bad
This film ain’t bad

Deathstalker (1983)

Kaira (Lana Clarkson) doesn't wear an awful lot in this movie...
Kaira (Lana Clarkson) doesn’t wear an awful lot in this movie…

Starring Rick (WARRIOR QUEEN) Hill, Barbi (X-RAY) Benton, Richard (FRIDAY THE 13TH: PART III) Brooker, Lana (AMAZON WOMEN ON THE MOON) Clarkson, Bernard Erhard and Victor Bo. Written by Howard R. (SATURDAY THE 14TH) Cohen and directed by James Sbardellati.

The pig-faced fighter!
The pig-faced fighter!

The warrior known as Deathstalker (Hill) goes on a quest to find three objects of power: a chalice, a sword, and an amulet. Deathstalker’s journey will lead him to the castle of a sorcerer,  where there is a tournament with different fights to the death…

"I have the power!" Oops, wrong movie
“I have the power!” Oops, wrong movie
Deathstalker is told of his quest by a witch
Deathstalker is told of his quest by a witch

DEATHSTALKER was one of the many low budget sword and sorcery films that came out in the wake of John Milius’ CONAN THE BARBARIAN (1982). This was one of only two films that James Sbardellati directed, as he was usually a first assistant director on such productions as BATTLE BEYOND THE STARS (1980), HUMANOIDS FROM THE DEEP (1980) and THE BEASTMASTER (1982), which is one of my favourite sword and sorcery flicks.

Was that 'tattoo' drawn on with a felt tip pen?
Was that ‘tattoo’ drawn on with a felt tip pen?

DEATHSTALKER, which features a witch, an imp and a weird little finger-eating puppet creature (it also likes to eat eyes), was an Argentine-American co-production (and was the first of several films that Roger Corman produced in Argentina.) As these kinds of threadbare fantasy productions go, DEATHSTALKER is an okay yarn that’s full of oiled warriors, semi-orgies, lots of half-naked women, mud wrestling, a pig-headed, tusked dude and a fairly lighthearted vibe.


The slimy puppet critter has severed hand for lunch!
The slimy puppet critter has a severed hand for lunch!

The movie, though far, far from being a fantasy classic, is certainly more enjoyable than the likes of ATOR, THE FIGHTING EAGLE (1982) and THE WARRIOR AND THE SORCERESS (1984), though it couldn’t possibly live up to the expectations created by Boris Vallejo’s cool poster. The ogre-creature that Boris depicts in his artwork is huge and impactful, gripping a desperate maiden with one huge hand as the beast-man raises a mace against the lithe hero. In the movie itself, this monstrous character is far less imposing, that’s for sure, but he’s still a fun, human-sized, boar-faced brute that enlivens proceedings.

Awesome Boris poster!
Awesome Boris poster!
Boar-brute versus the hero!
Boar-brute versus the hero!

More DEATHSTALKER films were to follow, and they all boasted posters that were always far better than the movies they represented!

A shot of a boar-dude holding a severed arm. Well, this is the Monster Zone, so we need lots of pics of the monsters!
A shot of a boar-dude holding a severed arm. Well, this is the Monster Zone, so we need lots of pics of the monsters!

Sadly, Lana Clarkson, who played the blonde warrior woman Kaira, was later murdered by record producer Phil Spector in 2003.

RIP Lana Clarkson
RIP Lana Clarkson

Alright then, one final look at ol’ piggy-features…

Oink!
Oink!

Up from the Depths (1979)

Furious fish-beast attacks a boat!
Furious fish-beast attacks a boat!

Starring Sam Bottoms, Susanne Reed and Virgil (THE CAT CREATURE) Frye. Written by Alfred M. Sweeney and Anne (BATTLE BEYOND THE STARS) Dyer, directed by Charles B. (WIZARDS OF THE LOST KINGDOM II) Griffith and produced by Cirio H. (VAMPIRE HOOKERS) Santiago, Rolando S. Atienza, Roger (DAY THE WORLD ENDED) Corman, Jill (DR. HECKYL AND MR. HYPE) Griffith and Manny Norman. A New World Pictures production.

Say "Cheese!"
Say “Cheese!”
Cool poster, though the monster definitely doesn't look like that in the movie!
Cool poster, though the monster definitely doesn’t look like that in the movie! Art by the very talented William Stout.

An underwater earthquake releases a big prehistoric fish. Yay!

This fiendish fish flick stars Sam (THE LAST PICTURE SHOW) Bottoms, who also starred in APOCALYPSE NOW, another movie shot in the Philippines. But that’s where similarities end, as UP FROM THE DEPTHS will never be mistaken for a classic film, whereas Francis Ford Coppola’s awesome Vietnam War-set epic is a bonafide classic movie.

Sorry, Sam, you took the paycheck so you've got to make this movie!
Sorry, Sam, you took the paycheck so you’ve got to make this movie!
It's got a big mouth!
It’s got a big mouth!

Even though Chris (THE FLY) Walas helped make the monster, there’s nothing particularly special about this fish-critter’s design, other than it has a double dorsal fin and resembles a grouper fish. The poster, however, tries to make out the beast is a kind of blue, spiky-skinned, red-eyed shark-monster. I’ve seen behind the scenes shots of the full-size fish-head prop being propelled through the water by divers, but supposedly it proved too heavy to move around much. So, basically, the beast is only fleetingly shown during its assaults on swimmers.

The fish-beast has a double dorsal fin
The fish-beast has a double dorsal fin

Maybe I’m easily pleased, but I thought the full scale monster fish head at least looked like a decently-made model, even if it did remind me of a grouper fish. The director, Charles B. Griffith (writer of such films as ATTACK OF THE CRAB MONSTERS, BEAST FROM HAUNTED CAVE, A BUCKET OF BLOOD and THE LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS), definitely wasn’t a fan of the monster model, however, and felt compelled to make the movie pretty much into a comedy. But when producer Roger Corman saw Griffith’s cut he wasn’t very happy, as he thought that audiences would feel cheated if they went to see a JAWS rip-off movie and discovered that it was a comedy instead, so Corman had it re-edited in post-production, turning it into a straight horror picture.

As it is, the silly dialogue merged with the more ‘serious’ story edit helps to sink this fishy tale, as does the murky underwater photography and the blurry, indistinct fish attacks (that use a smaller monster model). Oh well.

A typically murky shot
A typically murky shot
Honestly, there is a fish monster lurking within the murky water!
Honestly, there is a fish monster lurking within the murkiness!

Let’s at least end this post with a clearer shot of the fish…

Thar she blows!
Thar she blows!