Tag Archives: awesome

Drained (2024)

February 14, 2025 Ken Miller 3 Comments

Starring Ruaridh Aldington, Madalina Bellariu Ion, Craig Conway, Angela Dixon, Andrew Lyle-Pinnock, Natasha Patel, Andrew Lee Potts, Timothy Blore, Kenton Lloyd Morgan, Ayvianna Snow, Sean Earl McPherson and Matteo Pasquini.
Written by Peter Stylianou.
Directed by Peter Stylianou and Sean Cronin.
Produced by Sean Cronin, Peter Stylianou and Daniel Patrick Vaughan.
House54/Magnificent Films/RG Films/Red Guerilla Films

A young, jobless artist becomes obsessively attracted to a seductive woman he encounters at a London club, and he finds himself unable to stop seeing the woman, even after he discovers that she’s a vampire intent on feeding from him daily, draining him slowly…

Thomas' time spent with Rhea can be draining... — Thomas’ time spent with Rhea can be very draining…

The filmmakers do wonders with the budget available to them here, crafting a satisfying modern vampire tale. The protagonist’s relationship with his vampire lover effectively shows how romantic entanglements can be very needy and one-sided, ultimately becoming toxic for the obsessed partner. And in the case of this romance, it is literally a draining experience for the boyfriend, as he offers up his blood to keep his girlfriend satiated.

Madalina Bellariu Ion is Rhea the vampire

Ruaridh Aldington is a revelation here as the initially rather pathetic Thomas, an aimless young guy living at home with his mum, who falls head over heels for the sultry vampire Rhea, played nicely in a coldly no-nonsense manner by Romanian actress Madalina Bellariu Ion. The film’s success really depends upon Aldington making his character work, because Thomas is a pretty unprepossessing, ambition-free dude when we first meet him at the start of the film, as he masturbates in his bedroom, takes his mother’s hospitality for granted, and refuses to make any effort to get to know his mother’s new boyfriend. But, thanks to Aldington’s subtly persuasive acting here, we do start to care for Thomas as he navigates as best he can through his problematic relationship with Rhea.

Good actors can convey everything just with their eyes. Ruaridh Aldington is one of those actors

DRAINED has its own specific vampire rules. These include Rhea’s ability to fly and move super-quick when she wants to, she can walk about in the daytime (but she does like the sky to be cloudy, hence why she moved to London), she prefers to not fully drain and kill her victims if she can help it, but she must battle increased predatory urges during the full moon. Rhea needs to be invited into a person’s home, she likes to feed from arms rather than necks, and she is attracted to the blood of certain people – and it turns out that Thomas has just that type of blood, drawing Rhea to him.

This last point helps prevent the central relationship from being totally unequal: Rhea keeps coming back to Thomas because his blood is a little different, so they do share a mutual addiction (Thomas gets some kind of supernatural buzz from being fed upon), but it is definitely Rhea who has the upper hand in the relationship. As Thomas’ health begins to deteriorate, and he tries to break free, matters become more serious, and people die.

Don't get on the wrong side of Rhea... — Don’t get on the wrong side of Rhea…

There are some bloody scenes, but the film isn’t particularly gory. Rather than depending on show-stopping bouts of carnage, DRAINED keeps you watching because Aldington manages to make you care about his character’s plight. The script dodges the pitfall of becoming a typical vampire romance by being more honest about Rhea’s part in the ‘romance’: she never bullshits about being truly in love, and she openly admits to Thomas that it’s his blood that she needs on a very regular basis.

Vampire victims in this film always have puncture marks on their arms

With Thomas becoming a prime murder suspect, then finding himself on meds in a mental institution for a while, you’d be forgiven for assuming DRAINED must be quite dour and depressing, but it isn’t, thanks to the way it is filmed and acted, and because there’s a vein of humour threaded through the movie that lightens the atmosphere, a lot of it stemming from Thomas’ interactions with his mother’s new partner John, a local pest control expert, played by Craig Conway. The film also finds time to show that Rhea does have feelings after all, as she stays connected with her previous lover Andreas (Pasquini), who is severely ill. The inclusion of Andreas, whom Rhea refers to as her Old Man, also helps to drive home to Thomas (and the viewers) that this is what happens to anyone who stays too long with Rhea: they’ll be emotionally and physically sucked dry by her.

Craig Conway is John the exterminator, out to rid Thomas' mother's home of pests (and hopefully Thomas too) — Craig Conway is John the exterminator, out to rid Thomas’ mother’s home of pests (and hopefully Thomas too)

The cinematography by Daniel Patrick Vaughan is top-notch, the music score really enhances the film, and good story choices are made throughout by writer Peter Stylianou. Stylianou also co-directs the movie with Sean Cronin, who gets to play a SWAT captain during the finale!

Go and give this a watch, I’m sure you’ll enjoy it.

Demon of the Lute (1983)

February 8, 2025 Ken Miller Leave a comment

Starring Chin Siu-Ho, Kara Wai, Philip Kwok, Kei Kong-Hung, Jason Pai Piao, Yuen Tak and Lung Tien-Hsiang.
Written and directed by Lung I-Sheng.
Produced by Mona Fong for Shaw Brothers.

Feng Ling (Wai) is sent by her master to locate the special fiery bow and arrows that are the only treasures that can stop a mystery villain from using the lethal Six-Stringed Demonic Lute to wreak havoc everywhere. Along the way she teams-up with her brother Old Naughty (Tak), a likeable thief (Kwok) and his son, a good guy called Yuan Fei (Siu-Ho) and a powerful martial artist known as the Woodcutter (Tien-Hsiang).

This dude's got a huge chopper! — This dude’s got a huge chopper!

DEMON OF THE LUTE’s director, Lung I-Sheng (aka Tang Tak-Cheung), was primarily an actor in the Hong Kong film industry. He was also a martial arts director on many films, and he was the action designer on the very wild BUDDHA’S PALM (1982). This fantasy wuxia, you’ll be pleased to know, is equally over the top! It really is lots of fun, crammed with loads and loads of exotic characters! Let’s look at just some of them: there’s Red Haired Evil, who rides a small chariot drawn by german shepherd dogs and hurls his Thunder Flying Wheel weapon like a frisbee, Eagle Man, who can flap his costume’s wings to fly like a bird, Long Limb Evil, who can super-extend his arm, and Fatty Elf, who can entangle folks in his lengthy beard.

Red Haired Evil, riding his chariot pulled by dogs!

Watch out for Fatty Elf's super-long beard! — Watch out for Fatty Elf’s super-long beard!

One of my favourite fantastical characters in this outlandish fight flick is Skinny Elf, who has a misshapen forehead – he likes to sit on the hero’s shoulders and can’t be shaken off!

Utter strangeness abounds throughout this production, with warriors erupting from a giant silver ball, Feng Ling using her rainbow sword like a guided missile, a horseless wagon whizzing around with the deadly lute inside, some trees momentarily becoming monsters, Old Naughty riding his horse backwards, and a kitschy killer lute that glows with LED strip lights when it’s played.

The lethal magic lute's strings are made from dinosaur ligaments! — The lethal magic lute’s strings are made from dinosaur ligaments!

Though some of the music and on-screen antics become rather too childish (this film dedicates itself to children in the opening credits), DEMON OF THE LUTE has much to offer, including Kei Kong-Hung, who is surprisingly good as the thief’s plucky young son Xiao Ding Dong.

Let’s end this review with another look at Skinny Elf…

A Ballad About Green Wood (1983)

February 7, 2025 Ken Miller Leave a comment

This stop-motion crow ain't nice! — This stop-motion crow ain’t nice!

Written and directed by Jirí Barta. Music by Vladimír Merta. Art direction by Lenka Kerelová. Cinematography by Jan Vycítal. Edited by Helena Lebdusková.
Produced by Krátký Film Praha and Studio Jirího Trnky.

This short film from Czechoslovakia uses a mixture of live action and stop motion.

The movie begins with close-up shots of an axe chopping into logs. One log splits into multiple pieces of wood, some of which have faces. These wooden sticks rush about the landscape, seemingly elated that spring is coming, with the stop-motion footage intermixed with time-lapse photography of seeds germinating and the ice receding.

This stick has a woman's face — This stick has a woman’s face

The wooden stick with a maiden’s face is attacked by a crow, which pecks the stick to pieces and swallows the splinters.

The stop-motion crow now turns into a creepy, skull-faced, winged piece of wood. This weird log-thing flies over the countryside, enters a cavern lit by candles, and roosts upside down like a bat, becoming an icicle. Sunlight enters the cave and the icicle becomes the death-faced stump again, which fights a wooden carving of a knight on a horse. The knight wins!

The winged stick-monster flies over the woods

This heroic piece of wood is shaped like a knight on a horse!

The other sticks carry the winged, skull-headed piece of wood aloft and place it atop a bonfire on a hill. Then, instead of burning the bonfire, a stick with the maiden’s face uses a newly-grown leaf to make the bonfire burst into a flurry of spring growth, with long blades of green grass consuming the monster-branch, transforming it into a normal piece of wood once more.

The crow-stick is engulfed by a 'bonfire' of fresh grass — The crow-stick is engulfed by a ‘bonfire’ of fresh grass

Jirí Barta’s sweet-and-sinister short is inspired by Vesna, a female character from Slavic mythology, who is associated with rituals conducted in rural areas during springtime. Here she is represented as the wooden stick with a maiden’s face that is consumed by the black crow, then returns anew to ignite the return of spring, as symbolised by the bonfire of rapidly-growing grass.

The branch-of-badness is swamped by the blades of grass.,..

...and it becomes a normal piece of wood again, which sprouts fresh leaves — …and it becomes a normal piece of wood again, which sprouts fresh leaves

The yarn, which possesses a typically surreal Eastern European folktale vibe, begins in an upbeat manner, turns darker with the arrival of the crow-stump-creature, then seemingly becomes upbeat again after the (ritualistic-looking) ‘burning’ of the winged branch transforms it into a regular stick again, which starts to grow fresh leaves. This would be the happy ending, right? But Barta chooses to finish the story by showing the sticks being collected by a villager to be used as firewood. The final shot is of smoke issuing from a chimney! The end!

The stop-motion animation of the sticks and the puppet crow was done outside, on location in the Bohemian Forest, the High Tatras, and the Koněprusy Caves.

The animation was filmed on location in the outside environment

Barta’s other short films include THE VANISHED WORLD OF GLOVES (1982), THE PIED PIPER (1986), THE LAST THEFT (1987) and THE CLUB OF THE LAID OFF (1989).

Graveyard Shark (2024)

January 31, 2025 Ken Miller Leave a comment

Stephanie Ward plays Abby the cryptid hunter

Starring Stephanie Ward, Michael John Gilbert, Berndele March, Ryan Santiago, Madisen Zabawa, Olivia Walton and Olga N. Bogdanova. Written and directed by Matthew A. Peters. Produced by Joe Cappelli, Avery Guerra, Ainslee Looman, Anthony Clark Pierce, Brandon Wheeler, Sifundo Nene and Brandon Wheeler.
Mad Angel Films

A toothy humanoid creature known as the Graveyard Shark is said to be responsible for the disappearances of various people in the backwater town of Willsboro Point. Abby Wescott (Ward), a wannabe cryptid hunter, is called in to uncover the bloody truth behind these events. Accompanied by her assistant Greg (Gilbert), Abby eventually teams-up with local oddball Captain Seyburn (March) and members of a Graveyard Shark survivors counselling group. Even though the local shades-wearing sheriff (Santiago) says that the Graveyard Shark is just some local folklore nonsense, the critter proves to be all too real when it bloodily attacks a busty, tattooed female deputy whilst she’s enjoying a sex session with her colleague near the latest crime scene! Abby and her allies finally face-off against the creature (one of the counselling group women actually gets it on with the brute!), and the identity of the person who has been secretly helping the blue-skinned beast is revealed…

Graveyard Shark stalks through the foliage

One of the characters strokes Graveyard Shark's abs... — One of the characters strokes Graveyard Shark’s abs…

GRAVEYARD SHARK is a movie that most definitely doesn’t take itself seriously. The folks behind this knew (I hope) what their limitations were, so they proceeded to deliver a film full of dumb humour, copious amounts of spraying blood, stupid dialogue, boobs and a big beast.

The hammer-headed mutant rips out a human heart!

The film’s lighting and cinematography is on par with the general acting quality, which is to say that it’s all strictly amateur hour level. And yet… the filmmakers are obviously having fun, and this adds to the viewing experience. So, when we get the creature’s origin story, we can be sure that it will be a really stupid, stupid, stupid (but fun) origin story! You see, this muscled monster is the result of a union between eccentric loner Captain Seyburn… and a mermaid of colour that Seyburn encountered in a swamp! The whole backstory is explained to Abby as she sits with Seyburn in a diner. Seyburn describes, with the help of flashbacks, how he met a ‘fine-ass mermaid’ and they had comical intercourse which seemed to consist of Seyburn just grinding his groin against the underside of the mermaid’s tail. As Seyburn climaxes in his flashback, the film cuts to a shot of him in the diner, pouring melted butter all over a cooked lobster. Subtle this ain’t!

Captain Seyburn (Berndele March) talks with Abby... — Captain Seyburn (Berndele March) talks with Abby…

...and he divulges what happened when he met a mermaid in a swamp — …and he divulges what happened when he met a mermaid in a swamp

Abby learns from Captain Seyburn that the mermaid had returned with a love child, asking him for money to raise their lil’ shark-headed nipper, but Seyburn killed the siren with a shovel instead, burying her and the baby in the cemetery. But, somehow, the tiny mutant shark had clung to life and now it dwells in the graveyard…

Don't trust this dude — Don’t trust this dude

This film really is a dumbass nonsense-fest, with such silly scenes as a dream sequence in which Abby gets high and romps in bed with a bigfoot, who is actually Greg in a costume. But I felt compelled to keep watching anyway, in large part because the movie’s titular monster is brought to the screen via the old school method of using a monster suit!

The Graveyard Shark creature has a buff, musclebound humanoid body that is topped with a toothy hammerhead shark face! I’m just a sucker for practical effects creatures, even when it is a cartoony, cheesy-but-cool costume like this one! This hammer-headed fishy freak, designed by Anthony Clark Pierce, is far preferable to the sub-par CGI effects seen in most low-price b-movies of a similar budget, that’s for sure.

This monster looks like he's been down the gym! — This monster looks like he’s been down the gym!

Many of the monster attacks are shot in a very similar fashion, with the suitmation actor (Brandon Wheeler) shoving the costume’s shark head against the current victim’s neck, as blood is pumped everywhere. Though the results are samey, they are bloody, and there’s the occasional disembowelment of a victim added to the mix too.

Counsellor Dr. Jan Lovnik (Olga N. Bogdanova) is disemboweled!

GRAVEYARD SHARK is, without a doubt, a shoddy, cheapo production, which leaps at any chance to include some nekkid flesh and includes a lot of crass ‘humorous’ chat about going down on mermaids. But the film does end with a fight between the rubbery Graveyard Shark and a fuzzy werewolf! Yes, you read that correctly: it turns out that Greg is actually a man-wolf! This monster suit showdown is slapdash and, of course, pretty enjoyable, with the werewolf costume’s yellow-green eyes glowing so brightly they sometimes look like twin torch beams shining in the mist! So I kinda liked this flick anyway – sue me!

The Pale Door (2020)

January 27, 2025 Ken Miller 4 Comments

Zachary Knighton is pretty good in the role of gang boss Duncan

Starring Zachary Knighton, Devin Druid, Stan Shaw, Bill Sage, Melora Walters, Noah Segan, Pat Healy, Tina Parker, Natasha Bassett, Darryl Cox and Jennifer Rader. Written by Cameron Burns, Aaron B. Koontz and Keith Lansdale. Directed by Aaron B. Koontz, produced by Cameron Burns, Roman Dent and James Norrie.
Paper Street Pictures/Storyteller Media/BondIt Media Capital/Title Media.

'It was the perfect score, but hell was their reward' — ‘It was the perfect score, but hell was their reward’

After a member of his gang dies during a gun duel, Duncan (Knighton) begrudgingly allows his nice guy brother Jake (Druid) to make up the numbers for an upcoming train robbery. The outlaws (rather ruthlessly) kill all the Pinkertons guarding a locked chest in one of the carriages… but there’s no cash or gold inside it, instead there’s a young woman called Pearl (Bassett). This girl explains that she was abducted, and she tells the gang there’ll be a big reward if they take her back home, to a place called Potemkin. The outlaws decide this is the only way they can make any money now, so they head for this out of the way township. But they need to hurry, as their leader Duncan has been badly wounded and he’s in urgent need of medical attention. Once they do reach Potemkin, the place seems to be deserted at first, but Pearl leads the outlaws to a brothel, which is packed with friendly prostitutes. But these working ladies are not what they seem to be…

The brothel's madam, Maria (Melora Walters), is Pearl's mother — The brothel’s madam, Maria (Melora Walters), is Pearl’s mother

THE PALE DOOR really struggles at the beginning to properly paint a convincing picture of the time and place the story is meant to be set in. There’s a one-on-one gunfight scene, for instance, that in no way looks like it’s happening back in the late 1800s. It actually resembles something you’d see at a wild west historical re-enactment event. It just ain’t very convincing, pardner. I’m assuming that cash was really tight during the filming of these earlier sequences, but the filmmakers must’ve gotten themselves a little more money later on, as the movie does improve if you stick with it.

And the point at which the enjoyment levels of this film ratchet upwards occurs when the secret of Potemkin (which is kind of like a horror film version of Brigadoon) is finally revealed: all the feminine denizens of the brothel are, in actuality, ancient witches! And they’re not just your normal, average witches – these are blackened-skinned, crone-faced, scampering hags. They’re great! These hook-nosed, pointy-chinned occult harridans can defy gravity as they scuttle upside down on the ceiling, they frequently zip about in an animalistic fashion on all fours, and bullets don’t seem to keep ’em dead for long!

Hey, dude, there's an undead hag on the ceiling behind you! — Hey, dude, there’s an undead hag on the ceiling behind you!

With better direction from Aaron B. Koontz, and an injection of additional funding, THE PALE DOOR might have had a chance of becoming a much more memorable horror-action-western. Maybe my expectations had been set higher than they should’ve been because I’d spotted Joe R. Lansdale (BUBBA HO-TEP, COLD IN JULY) credited as one of the film’s executive producers, though perhaps he was involved in view of the fact his son Keith is one of the writers. As it is, the quality of the acting varies a lot (Devin Druid has a cool-sounding name, but his thespian skills ain’t so hot), and better lighting in some of the scenes definitely would’ve helped matters. But, hey, the film (which was partly shot in Rollins Creek Old West Town, located outside of Guthrie, Oklahoma) does manage to gradually become better and better as it progresses, thanks to a satisfying score from Alex Cuervo, the inclusion of folk horror-style costumes that mix long cloaks with a variety of horned animal skulls, and a novel death scene involving a crow emerging beak-first from a victim’s bloody mouth.

Above: a couple of shots of the witches kitted out in their folk horror-style gear

There’s a topsy-turvy sequence in a church, which involves one of the outlaws being mysteriously compelled to mutilate himself, a fleeting deluge of blood, plus several Puritan-era flashbacks, and two burning-at-the-stake scenes (which are obligatory for witch-themed flicks, right?)

The way in which the gang members brutally murder the Pinkerton detectives during the locomotive robbery (including some spurs-in-the-mouth violence) hardly makes these people an appealing bunch to root for (only Jake is not a die-hard killer), but attempts are made to garner sympathy for the outlaws once they come under threat in Potemkin, and some of the heartfelt melodrama between brothers Duncan and Jake featured in the film’s later stages is not totally without merit, aided as it is by Cuervo’s music. But, let’s be honest, it’s definitely the confrontations with the swarms of grimy, raggedy, semi-undressed, burnt-bodied witches that are the standout portions of this production, including one shot where a witch lurches out of a puddle of blood during a downpour. The outlaws-vs-witches-in-a-brothel set piece is without doubt the movie’s best sequence, so lets spare a moment to acknowledge the contributions made by Krista Perry, Shannon Beshears and Jennifer Rader: they were the film’s ‘Stunt witches’!

Let’s finish with another look at one of the skull-faced costumes worn by the witches…

The Wyrm of Bwlch Pen Barras (2023)

January 23, 2025 Ken Miller Leave a comment

Starring Bryn Fôn, Morgan Hopkins, Sean Carlsen, Victoria Pugh and Morgan Llewelyn-Jones. Written and directed by Craig Williams. Produced by Julien Allen for Two Draig Films.

'Fate will unwind as it must' — ‘Fate will unwind as it must’

When Gwyn (Fôn) gets an early morning phone call, it’s obvious he is being informed about something that is serious, and it’s also clearly an occurrence that has happened before. What seems to concern Gwyn and his wife Anwen (Pugh) most is the fact that this event has started sooner this time around..

We follow Gwyn as he fetches items hidden in his attic, makes another call, then heads out to pick up the two other members of his team, Emlyn (Hopkins) and Dai (Carlsen). These men drive over to a farm, where they physically attack and subdue Dafydd (Llewelyn-Jones), who they shove into the boot of their car. They drive Dafydd to Bwlch Pen Barras mountain, get him out of the vehicle, and lead him further up the slope. The young captive’s wrists are tethered to a tree branch with rope, black markings are applied to Dafydd’s face, and Gwyn calls out to the Queen of the Mountain as something horrible happens to Dafydd off-screen…

Dafydd is the latest sacrifice... — Dafydd is the latest sacrifice…

This short Welsh movie, shot on nicely-grainy Kodak Super 16mm film, purposefully leaves a lot of details unanswered, so viewers must fill in the blanks themselves. Just what is it that has happened sooner this time? How are the sacrificial victims chosen? Is this a ritual tradition that has been undertaken by multiple generations of Gwyn’s family?

The film’s title is the main clue to explain what is actually occurring in the story: the word ‘Wyrm’ relates to dragons, such as the one featured in the Anglo-Saxon poem Beowulf. A red dragon, of course, is the most prominent symbol of Wales and it is included on the kingdom’s flag. Though the legendary creature is a symbol of national pride in Wales, in local myths dragons can have a more ambiguous or infernal significance. Writer-director Craig Williams has said in an interview that there are still folk stories which carry symbolic weight today in which dragons protect villages for a price, and he explained that he wanted to draw on that idea in the context of a horror film.

Some viewers will be frustrated that the finale refrains from actually showing the creature: THIS IS A MONSTER-RELATED MOVIE THAT DOESN’T SHOW THE MONSTER! But, though I can sympathise with that opinion, I found some tasty tidbits to savour throughout this folk-horror-urban-fantasy’s brief running time, including the sweetly unnerving opening music by Dafydd Ieuan & Cian Ciarán (of the band Super Furry Animals). The overall no-nonsense vibe of the piece is the film’s main selling point, as it depicts the average Joe characters going about their business in a down-to-earth manner. Gwyn is very restrained and world-weary, Emlyn is rather fretful, out of shape, and is evidently content to follow Gwyn’s lead, whilst Dai likes to act the hard man, obviously getting a kick out of what he’s doing.

Above: Gwyn, Emlyn and Dai — Above – shots of the protagonists (top to bottom): Gwyn, Emlyn and Dai

THE WYRM OF BWLCH PEN BARRAS was originally shot as two versions, one in English and one in Welsh. But it soon became apparent to Williams, during the postproduction process, that the Welsh version felt far richer and seemed more true to the material, so that was the one the director submitted to film festivals.

This unflashy short film acts almost like an extract from some larger work, and it poses enough questions (Why has the Wyrm’s need for a sacrifice become more regular? When will the rituals not be enough?) to make me want to see them answered in a more substantial follow-up movie – and hopefully a sequel would put the scaly ‘Queen of the Mountain’ on screen!

We didn't get to see what attacked Dafydd in this film. If there's a sequel we want to see the dragon! — We didn’t get to see what attacked Dafydd in this film. If there’s a sequel we want to see the dragon!

Unwelcome (2022)

January 6, 2025 Ken Miller 1 Comment

Starring Hannah John-Kamen, Douglas Booth, Colm Meaney, Kristian Nairn, Chris Walley, Niamh Cusack and Jamie-Lee O’Donnell. Written by Jon Wright and Mark Stay. Directed by Jon Wright. Produced by Piers Tempest, Peter Touche and Lauren Cox. Tempo Productions/Ingenious Media/Rococo Films

Several months after they suffer a violent home invasion incident in their inner city London apartment, young couple Maya (John-Kamen) and Jamie (Booth) eagerly move to a village in Ireland when Jamie inherits a house from his recently deceased aunt. To fix a hole in the roof, they hire the Whelan family building firm, but these four individuals prove to be a loutish, aggressive and strange bunch. To add to their woes, Maya and Jamie are informed by local landlady Maeve (Cusack) that their late aunt had believed in the ‘old ways’ and used to leave blood offerings at the bottom of her garden to appease the Little People… and Maeve emphasises that these creatures, also known as the Far Darrig or Redcaps, are not jolly little elves: they’re hungry and they’ll need feeding every day. Not wanting Maeve to be trespassing onto their land to continue this tradition, Maya promises that she will regularly leave a plate of raw liver near the garden gate… which leads into the vast woodland beyond, where a small, domed stone building lurks amongst the trees…

The forest lurks beyond the garden wall... — The forest awaits beyond the garden wall…

Hannah John-Kamen is on top form as the heavily pregnant Maya, nicely balancing her character’s varied emotions, ranging from happiness (especially when she discovers she’s pregnant), to fearfulness, to (when required) boldness, as she faces various challenges throughout the story. Douglas Booth, whether intentionally or not, comes across as rather irritating playing the pleasant-but-wimpy Jamie, who is always striving, but failing, to stand up to the bullies in his life. Niamh Cusack, as Maeve, manages to make her friendly warnings regarding the Redcaps come across as sincere and believable, and Colm Meaney seems to be having fun playing ‘Daddy’ Whelan, the rough patriarch overseeing his obnoxious adult kids, who are all pretty weird but played straight by Chris Walley, Jamie-Lee O’Donnell and Kristian Nairn.

There’s a pleasant use of lush colours in the film, with cinematographer Hamish Doyne-Ditmas ensuring the surrounding countryside is verdantly green and the sun is always golden. The large garden seems to be a big indoor set most of the time, and this slight artificiality adds to the twisted fairytale look and feel of the production.

The film features lots of yellowy golds and greens for its colour palette

Director Jon Wright, who also made the wonderful sci-fi-horror-comedy GRABBERS (2012), has described UNWELCOME as ‘GREMLINS meets STRAW DOGS’, and this production does, to a degree, fit this description, though it seems that Wright couldn’t quite make up his mind whether to make his film a gritty home invasion movie, or a horror movie, or a creature feature comedy. GRABBERS certainly balanced its horror and humour elements better, but UNWELCOME does prove to be an enjoyably watchable yarn.

'Beware the locals. All of them.' — ‘Beware the locals. All of them.’

The UK/Irish production holds back from showing the Redcaps till later in the tale and, when the Little People do make their appearance, the movie’s entertainment value really rockets skywards!

The sharp-nosed, pointy-eared, caped Redcaps are so much fun! They are violent, belly-slitting, dagger-throwing little buggers, but they’re also almost sweet somehow due to their interactions with each other. These Little People will help you out if you ask a favour… but you must pay a price! This last point, of course, leads to a finale in which Maya must prove herself to be really ruthless in order to get her child back.

The first time we see one of the Far Darrig properly is when one of the cowled critters lets itself into the house, walks over to Maya, and presents her with the severed head of a would-be rapist in a plastic bag. The lil’ Redcap in this scene looks great, thanks to the fact the wee fellow is obviously a fine example of the use of practical effects. Soon we get to see more of the Little People, and they all boast different facial features!

These superbly crafted Redcaps are played by short actors wearing costumes and latex masks. For a lot of the shots, this simple approach (which included the use of double-sized sets) is enough, with no VFX required. When one Redcap is hacked in the head with a cleaver, the filmmakers simply smash the cleaver into a puppet! But, when the Redcaps are required to talk, or to emote, the filmmakers replace the masks and use the minimum amount of 3D VFX possible. This approach, for me, looks far better than the use of CGI-only creatures: the in-camera effects and the post production digital VFX here work wonderfully together! And this all helps make the violent set piece showdown towards the end of the movie so memorable, when Maya (who ends up going into labour!) and Jamie take-on the psycho Whelan family in their home… and the Redcaps join the bloody skirmish too!

A Redcap is hacked in the head with a cleaver!

Perhaps UNWELCOME underplays the comedy a little, and it doesn’t quite hit the mark when it comes to the horror moments sometimes, but it is entertaining. And I really enjoyed the finale, which reaches an unexpectedly triumphant, strange & very exuberant climax!

But, yeah, for me it is the excellent Redcaps (which remind me, design-wise, of the illustrations seen in the book Faeries by Brian Froud and Alan Lee) that help make the movie such a satisfying fantasy-horror picture!

'Break a promise, pay the price' — ‘Break a promise, pay the price’

SOME BEHIND THE SCENES SHOTS.

The Prosthetics Studio, run by Shaune Harrison and Paula Anne Booker-Harrison, created the Redcap masks and other prosthetics for UNWELCOME. Take a look at these beauties…

Water Monster 2 (2021)

December 30, 2024 Ken Miller Leave a comment

The aquatic being known as Lord Water Monkey

Starring Wang Zhener, Han Dong, Liu Lincheng and Wang Jianguo. Written by Chien Shih-Keng. Directed by Xiang Qiuliang and Xiang Hesheng. Produced by Guo Runze, Jing Wu and Xiang Weibin.
Beijing Tmeng Network Technology Co/Hainan Golden Seagull Media

A forensic doctor, Du (Zhener), ventures to a misty, boggy settlement called Shangshui Town to look for her missing brother. The townsfolk are not too willing to help her, however, because they are in thrall to a superstition involving an aquatic monster they call Lord Water Monkey, whom they fear might punish them if they get involved. Du digs deeper into the local mysteries, people continue to get killed, she finds her brother’s body, and plans are made to trap the swamp-beast, but things are not as they seem…

Wang Zhener plays the gun-toting doctor Du

This sequel to WATER MONSTER (2019), made by the same two directors, tells a different story with different characters, and is a pleasingly shot and art directed production, using the waterlogged, mist enshrouded locations effectively.

Central to the enjoyment of WATER MONSTER 2 is Wang Zhener’s performance as the outsider who, after black and white flashbacks, dreams, and meetings with various characters, learns that her name is actually Qingling and she originally lived in this town as a girl, involved in a tragic backstory inextricably linked to the origins of Lord Water Monkey. Zhener has a well maintained composure about her, playing Qingling/Du as a calm, smart and driven character. She really stands out, especially in a sub-genre (modern Chinese creature features) where many female leads teeter on being pretty, tough and rather one-dimensional. This film might feature a slimy, leaping marsh monster, but it is obvious that Zhener is totally committed to her role and really shines in every scene.

Wang Zhener is good as the forensic doctor

At one point the locals want to use Du as a human sacrifice

The town people’s ceremonies, aimed at appeasing the water monster, which they regard as a deity, imbue the film with a folk horror atmosphere, while a fast-paced sequence showing the eventual capture of Lord Water Monkey injects some vital energy into the tale. This set piece is full of invention, as Qingling and a group of locals use a series of elaborate boobytraps and other rope & wooden mechanisms to attack the Gollum-esque creature, keep the heroine out of harm’s way, and then trap the man-beast.

Above: two shots showing the local folks taking part in their Lord Water Monkey ceremony — Above: three shots showing the local folks taking part in their Lord Water Monkey ceremony

The story now takes an interesting turn, as Qingling uncovers information revealing that the town elders are corrupt, lying opium-smuggling gangsters: they are the real culprits behind the ongoing spate of child disappearances and murders! The slimy-skinned, hunched, ridge-backed water ‘monster’ turns out to be Qinghe, the biological brother of Qingling, a sibling she’d lost all memories of. Qinghe’s grotesque form is, it’s explained, due to a rare hereditary disease, and his feral nature was triggered by the vile actions of the elders many years ago. After these revelations, Qingling finally gets to fight back against the bad guys and really looks striking as she goes into action, keeping commendably cool, wearing her traditional cheongsam dress and toting a rifle that she’s ready and willing to use!

Above: two pics showing the poor deformed, slimy Qinghe — Above: two pics showing the deformed, slimy Qinghe

The titular aquatic monster is often CGI in the fast-moving action shots, but he looks much better when a practical creature suit is used, especially during the finale, where we can see Qinghe in more detail. Here the heavily deformed Qinghe is treated in an empathetic manner, as he overcomes his urges to harm his sister, then dies saving child slave opium workers from drowning. It’s actually quite a touching finale!

Above: four more shots of Qinghe, formerly known as Lord Water Monkey

WATER MONSTER 2 is well-handled, well-paced and is, all in all, an entertaining murder-mystery-creature-feature-drama.

Fire and Ice (1983)

December 27, 2024 Ken Miller 2 Comments

Written by Roy Thomas and Gerry Conway. Directed by Ralph Bakshi. Produced by Ralph Bakshi, Frank Frazetta, Lynne Betner, John W. Hyde and Richard R. St. Johns.
Polyc International BV/Producers Sales Organization.

The evil Queen Juliana and her son Nekron utilise their ability to weaponise glaciers to force their opponents to retreat southwards. Princess Teegra, the daughter of opposition leader King Jarol, is kidnapped by Juliana’s subhuman minions, because the ice queen believes Teegra should be her son’s bride.

In the ensuing adventure, Teegra escapes from the subhumans but is eventually recaptured, blond-haired hero Larn, who grows close to the princess, vows to free her from Nekron’s icy lair, and wolf-masked warrior-dude Darkwolf kicks subhuman ass! Added to the mix are various monsters, a witch, and lots of lava at the end.

You can tell Queen Juliana is evil just by the way she laughs

Part of the wave of early 80s sword and sorcery films, this Ralph Bakshi animated production has a fairly minimal plot, written by Marvel scribes Gerry Conway & Roy Thomas, that provides lots of opportunities for the underdressed protagonists to be chased by or fight caveman-like subhumans. Adding to the sword and sorcery credentials of this film is the fact that fantasy artist supreme Frank Frazetta was Bakshi’s main collaborator on the project.

Princess Teegra has a quick wash during her adventure

The mix of rotoscoped characters and painted background scenes (painted by Thomas Kinkade and James Gurney) lacks the finesse of Disney, but the style does capture the feel of Marvel’s Conan comics (which were written by Roy Thomas) and the action is more violent than anything seen in a Disney movie.

Ouch! This isn't the kinda thing you see in a Disney cartoon! — Ouch! This isn’t the kinda thing you see in a Disney cartoon!

Since my first viewing of the film when it was released, I have retained a fondness for it. Being a Bakshi film, FIRE AND ICE has a small budget that hurts its large scale moments (such as shots of a fast-moving glacier wrecking a village): these scenes are somewhat lacking in detail and seem a little rushed. But the smaller scale action sequences (all the hand-to-hand combat stuff ) are really well handled. There’s something about Bakshi’s rotoscope technique (the use of live action photography to act as the source material for the cell animation) that gives the fight action a vicious, realistic-looking, adult edge.

The design of the production definitely has Frazetta’s aesthetic fingerprints plastered all over it. Amongst other things, Frazetta created sculpted busts to aid the animators, and he produced character designs.

Three busts, of Teegra, Darkwolf and a subhuman, which were sculpted by Frank Frazetta to aid the animators

The shapely fantasy femme Teegra, the Neanderthal-like subhumans, and the axe-wielding berserker Darkwolf are all obviously the creations of Frazetta: you can see their likenesses in many of his paintings. Most of the characters are very under-clothed, and it’s no surprise that the film’s Costume Designer was Frazetta!

Don't make Darkwolf angry! — Don’t make Darkwolf angry!

The creatures featured in the film include a cyclopean lake octopus, a giant swamp lizard, black-furred wolves, a bug-like beast that chows down on a subhuman’s arm, and pterosaur-esque flying reptiles that are ridden into battle against the villains.

Above: two shots of the lake octopus-monster's purple-coloured eye! — Above: two shots of the lake octopus-monster’s purple-coloured eye!

A subhuman dude falls victim to a weird bug-thing that attaches itself to his arm!

Above: three pics showing the pterodactyl-type creatures that are used for an
aerial assault on the bad guys — Above: three pics showing the pterodactyl-type creatures that are used for an aerial assault on the bad guys

FIRE AND ICE is a pulpy, fast-paced, rollicking fantasy-action adventure that doesn’t pretend to be deep or meaningful. Basically, it’s a fine piece of animated eye candy that’s always worth an occasional rewatch.

A Teegra Model Chart — A Teegra model sheet

Princess Teegra concept art (graphite on 12 field 3-peghole animation paper) — Teegra concept art by Frank Frazetta (graphite on 12 field 3-peghole animation paper)

One of Frank Frazetta’s original Darkwolf character designs

This was Frazetta's suggestion for how the US poster for FIRE AND ICE should look — This was Frazetta’s suggestion for how the US poster for FIRE AND ICE should look

Here are behind the scenes shots showing the live action actors who were used as reference for the rotoscoping…

Above: three photos taken during the live action filming (Frank Frazetta can be seen in the bottom two pics and Ralph Bakshi is in the top shot)

Let’s end this post with one more look at the rampaging rotoscoped mayhem…

The Treadwell Brothers

December 16, 2024 Ken Miller 1 Comment

A sneak peek at a host of film zombies that are being created the old school way, which is just the way I like it!

A retro, practical-effects zombie! Woot!

THE TREADWELL BOTHERS is a low budget film that is in its preproduction stage and, hopefully, once finished it will find its way onto Amazon Prime. Maybe the movie will raise its rotting head on YouTube: I guess we’ll just have to wait and see. The two filmmakers behind this project, brothers David and Philip Fitzgerald, are currently trying out zombie makeup designs, doing lighting tests, and becoming accustomed to using their new camera – a Cannon Eos C300 mark II. Philip will be operating the camera and David will be making the zombies. Both brothers will be starring in the film, and Philip will be directing. David is the co-director and, though he is credited as David Fitzgerald for his makeup effects work, he will be using his stage name, William Fitzgerald, as his acting credit. Got all that? Cool, let’s move on…

The Fitzgerald brothers will play the titular TREADWELL BROTHERS

The plot will focus on characters dealing with a world that has just about managed to contain a zombie apocalypse. Society has fragmented, with pockets of survivors living in disparate communities. The protagonists are the Treadwell Brothers (played by the Fitzgerald brothers), who were ‘Cleaners’ during the war with the zombies. These Cleaners were operatives set up by the military, and they persevered even after the military’s capabilities had been degraded. Now, in this post-war world, the Treadwell Brothers continue to ply their trade, being paid in kind to keep stray zombies out of towns and other human settlements.

A shot from test footage taken of a zombie shambling near a disused railway — A shot from test footage taken of a zombie lurking near a disused railway

But there are other Cleaner teams out there, and one gang in particular has its own agenda. There’s also a twisted professor trying to create the perfect anti-zombie zombie, which he aims to use to destroy the other undead corpses… but the prof has begun tinkering with humans to perfect his super-zombie.

As the story progresses, the Brothers continue their debate regarding the origin of the zombie outbreak: one believes it’s some kind of biblical punishment, and the other says that it’s a man-made phenomena. Eventually, though, they will discover the outbreak’s true source…

But let’s focus on the zombie designs now, which are still in their preproduction stage…

There will be various ‘character’ zombies, including: Oiler Zombie, Mother Zombie, Baghead Zombie, Soldier Zombie, Hoodie Zombie, and Black Eyes Zombie.

This is the Oiler Zombie prior to painting. The finished version will be burnt on one side

David, who created the ghostly, bandaged demon-dog creature in the short film SQUEAK AND I’LL RUN TO YOU (2021), is building the zombies using various old school, retro techniques, including the direct-build method. He has taken inspiration from such makeup effects legends as Roy (TALES FROM THE CRYPT, THE PLAGUE OF THE ZOMBIES) Ashton and Jack (DRACULA, FRANKENSTEIN, WHITE ZOMBIE) Pierce, using materials like cotton batting (absorbent cotton pressed into pads or layers) that is impregnated with liquid latex to create dead skin. David says that one of his movie touchstones for this project is Fulci’s ZOMBIE FLESH EATERS (1979), and his Hoodie Zombie is inspired by Amando de Ossorio’s BLIND DEAD movies. He hopes the practical zombie effects will imbue THE TREADWELL BROTHERS with an Amicus vibe too.

CGI zombies, like those in WORLD WAR Z can be okay, but I prefer guys in zombie makeup and prosthetics! — CGI zombies, like the ones in WORLD WAR Z (2013), can be okay, but I prefer guys in zombie makeup/latex masks/prosthetics, just like the undead dude above!

So let’s feast our eyes on some zombie-tastic designs now!
(note: these are shots of in-progress creations, so the costumes haven’t been distressed and broken down yet, etc)

Early-stage Hoodie Zombie, when David was considering giving it a hanging jaw — Early-stage Hoodie Zombie, when David was considering giving it a very distinct hanging jaw

Then David decided to make the detached jaw effect more subtle and less grisly

Above: two shots of the later version of the Hoodie Zombie

Chest and ribs detail of a zombie, prior to painting

Cotton batting, impregnated with liquid latex, is used to create the zombies' dead skin — Cotton batting, impregnated with liquid latex, is used to create the zombies’ dead skin

The Soldier Zombie's skull-head was made from Carte Lana wool paper, then covered in rubber and cotton batting — The Soldier Zombie’s skull-head was made from Carte Lana wool paper, then covered in rubber and cotton batting

Carte Lana wool paper can be made to look very skull-like. Note that these teeth haven't been given aged detailing yet — Carte Lana wool paper can be made to look very skull-like. Note that these teeth haven’t been given aged detailing yet

Skin texture is sculpted into the cotton batting before it completely dries... — Skin texture is sculpted into the cotton batting before it completely dries…

This is a rough, early-stage 'clay sketch' for a background zombie — This is a rough, early-stage ‘clay sketch’ for a background zombie

Sculpt of the Soldier Zombie's gnarly hand — Sculpt of the Soldier Zombie’s gnarly hand

This very effective-looking zombie hand was created by gluing the latex moulding onto a glove!

A look at the liquid latex & cotton ‘skin’ used for the zombies

Above: two more shots of the Hoodie Zombie

So here’s hoping that the Fitzgerald brothers start filming their undead opus, so we’ll get a chance to watch their wonderfully old school zombies shambling across the screen!

A zombie on the loose: this looks like a job for THE TREADWELL BROTHERS!

Devoted to every kind of movie and TV monster, from King Kong to Godzilla, from the Blob to Alien. Plus monsters from other media too, including books and comics.