Starring Stephen Fung, Sam Lee, Alice Chan, Chan Wai Ming, Benny Lai, and Frankie Ng Chi-Hung, directed by Stephen Fung.
Nom, nom, nom…
Dr Harry (Lai) smuggles a sample of weaponised virus from a lab that’s attempting to create ‘painless warriors’, but he is bitten by one of the test subjects (Jude Poyer) and slowly turns into a zombie-like being, triggering an outbreak of the undead at a rural Hong Kong police station.
Green gunk dribbles from Dr Harry’s mouth during sex…
There’s too much extraneous chat and a string of pointless scenes padding out the beginning of this movie, but matters become more interesting once Harry starts drooling green gunk during sex, rips apart the occupants of a police cell and then becomes a super-strong, scabby-faced ‘New Human’, who can bend bars.
Harry gets pretty strong
Could’ve been better…
Instead of being a super-soldier thriller, as suggested by the opening sequence, BIO-COPS evolves into a zombie outbreak flick and is really rather silly. Quite a few zombies seem to like to hide in lockers, a cop gets his arse bitten by petty hoodlum Cheap (Lee), who’s just pretending to be a zombie, and Frankie Ng Chi-Hung simply looks embarrassed playing zombified Hung Hing triad gang boss Kow.
For a ‘zombie’, Harry talks quite a bit
Reminiscent of BIO-ZOMBIE (1998) in some ways, this film is nowhere near as good as that flick, though the diverting latter zombie siege moments, involving submachine guns and pump-action shotguns, do enliven the story, but the finale lacks fizz, turning into a talky confrontation between cop hero Marco (Fung), his girlfriend May (Wai Ming) and Harry, but at least it ends with Harry having a grenade shoved into his mouth. Boom!
Starring Lau Kar-Leung, Tang Lai-Ying, Mark Cheng, Wong Jing, Hsu Shu-Yuan and Stuart Ong, written by Wong Jing and directed by Dennis Yu.
We see the cat creature in her true form during the prologue, but must wait until the last five minutes to see the cat-woman again
An evil cat demon-spirit reappears every 50 years and a descendant of the demon-fighting Cheung family has always been there to combat it, in a cycle of events that spans the past 400 years. Now the final cat spirit has been set free on the Earth and Master Cheung, who is suffering from cancer, enlists the help of young chauffeur Ah Long (Cheng) to destroy the evil once and for all. Armed with a bow and three charmed arrows, Long & Cheung hunt down the energy-absorbing feline entity, which first possesses Long’s boss Mr Fan and then his personal assistant, Tina.
The possessed Mr Fan likes to eat live carp
DVD cover
Evil Cat is standard 80s Hong Kong horror-fantasy fare, with the requisite amounts of humour and suspense, with decent action scenes overseen by master martial arts director Lau Kar-Leung, who also plays spirit-fighter Cheung.
A cop has a hand rammed right through his body
Written by Wong Jing, the film gains momentum once Tina (Shu-Yuan) gets possessed, triggering scenes in which she bites off the tongue of a pop star during sex in a car, rams her hand through a policeman’s body, and withstands multiple gunshot hits when cops blast at her during an energetic police station rampage.
Lots of swirling spectral lights as the evil cat spirit enters Tina’s body
Tina turns nasty
The plot’s supernatural lore is patchy at best, with the cat-demon easily jumping from host to host, even when it is stabbed by the supposedly lethal magic arrows, but the movie doesn’t worry itself too much about the fuzziness of its mythology, concentrating instead on supplying incident after incident, intent on reaching its climax, where the evil spirit finally reveals its true form: a pale, white-haired cat-woman.
During the police station rampage the possessed Tina really gets shot-up by the cops…
…and the policemen keep on shooting Tina… and she doesn’t die!
Evil Cat doesn’t really stick in the memory, but it is never dull and certainly passes the time nicely enough.
We see the evil cat spirit’s true form again during the finale
She could definitely audition for the Andrew Lloyd Webber show…
Starring Billy Chong, Lo Lieh, Sung Gam-Shing and Fang Mien, directed by Lee Chiu for The Eternal Film Company.
Green-lit ghoul
During the annual Ghost Festival, bare-chested hero Chun (Chong) is visited by the eyeless, green-faced spectre of his dead dad, who informs his son that he was a victim of murder. Chun decides to go to Yellow Dragon Town to get revenge for pops, but it won’t be easy as the villain controls a bunch of henchmen and is aided by a black magician priest (Gam-Shing). After Chun is pestered by hopping undead corpses in a playful scene, he’s inspired to go back to the location of a book of magic, which he uses to raise a group of mangle-faced undead to do his bidding.
DVD cover
These undead know how to make their own crucifix
This film is a great deal of fun!
Just to illustrate this, let’s look at what happens in a nicely-mounted confrontation between Chun and his ghosts versus the bad priest, who uses a magical cape and two long-tongued spirits in pointy hats to fight back. Chun stands his ground, retaliates by using his glowing magic book, turning the black magician’s spirits into puddles. But the movie’s weird factor is now suddenly turned up a notch as the priest piles on the pressure… by summoning Count Dracula! Wonderful stuff!
Zapped by the magic book!
Billy Chong’s fight moves are a joy to watch, plus we get to see a deadly ghost with stretching arms, a long-range flamethrower breath attack, women’s underwear thrown at the wizard to weaken him and a scene where the main villain (Lieh) is chased by the burning scalps of his victims!
These surreal elements, added to fine action courtesy of martial arts directors Alan Hsu and Sung Gam-Shing, make this a very entertaining kung-fu-horror-fantasy yarn.
Starring Tai Liang-Chun, Ai Fei, Lily Li, Wang Lai, Eric Chan and Yu Tsui-Ling, directed by Kuei Chih-Hung for Shaw Brothers.
The creature from the well assaults its first victim
The story takes place in a mansion in a quiet back alley, where the members of the dysfunctional Shi family and their servants act very superstitiously on the 1st and 15th day of each month, because this is when freaky stuff can happen, due to the fact that thirteen members of the family were killed by bandits and thrown into a dry well many years ago. When a weird, pink, toothy ‘bloody frog’ is encountered, this is seen as a bad omen for sure, as this amphibian always presages ominous events. Terrible things do begin to happen, with a slimy, horned monster crawling out of the well, intent on raping and killing.
Pink goo and tentacles
A slime-coated victim of the tentacle-monster
Kuei Chih-Hung, director of luridly memorable Hong Kong horror opuses like THE BOXER’S OMEN, CORPSE MANIA, BEWITCHED and THE KILLER SNAKES, clearly decided not to hold back when making this demented, gooey weird-fest, choosing to merge murder mystery plotting with creature feature imagery, adding exploitative sexual abuse scenes to make the movie that bit more sleazy.
Lots of goo dribbles from the tentacled creature onto its victims
Another ‘bloody frog’
The story somehow manages to combine a subplot involving certain relatives trying to kill off the Shi family’s wheelchair-bound matriarch (Lai) in order to inherit her house, with footage of a demon-headed well-monster with two tentacles instead of hind legs that sexually assaults its female victims and kills them with its flesh-ripping steel teeth, with shots of a mystery figure secretly feeding offal to a pit full of spiky bloody frogs, with scenes of abusive cousin Jinhua (Fei) hypnotising one of the maids so that he can have sex with her, resulting in an unwanted pregnancy. As you can see: Kuei Chih-Hung obviously believes that enough is never enough!
The well-critter rips chunks of flesh from people with its steel teeth
After seeing this poster you wanna see the movie, right?
We get close-ups of the tentacle-monster’s extendable appendage as it sucks out the eyeballs of elderly manservant Quan and see the critter cover its female victims with pink, gelatine-like slime… and yet… it’s eventually revealed that this beast is actually fake, just a guy in a suit! This is all an elaborate set-up, of course, involving fake identities, obscure secondary characters and the matriarch herself, who is not really disabled and can become an unstoppable maniac… until she is beheaded! The unimaginably preposterous denouement would have us believe that all of the strange happenings were fabricated and nothing supernatural actually occurred, yet the film never provides a real-world explanation for the existence of the flesh-eating bloody frogs, which chow down on several people, including a bound-up maid. Did these amphibians mutate purely because they were fed lots of offal? Does it matter, really? This is a loopy film where logic takes a backseat, so that the director can focus on batshit crazy stuff like a mad granny secretly sewing costumes for a kid’s skeleton in the attic, perverted amateur hypnotism, and outrageously far-fetched murder schemes.
Bloody frogs chew on Quan’s face!
Off with her head!
A tied-up maid is unable to escape an attack by a bunch of bloody frogs!
The main character is quite Norman Bates-like sometimes, only he’s more disturbed than Norman!
Starring Kam Kwok-Leung, Li Lin-Lin, Chen Chun, Lin Feng and Ko Ti-Hua, directed by Kuei Chih-Hung for Shaw Brothers.
A box full of slithering snakes
Snakes on the carpet!
Zhihong is a poor, gawky, bullied youth living in a shack next to a snake bladder store in a rundown Hong Kong neighbourhood. When an injured cobra slithers through a crack in the store wall, entering Zhihong’s ramshackle home, he decides to stitch up the serpent’s wound and look after it, triggering a set of circumstances that will lead to Zhihong using his killer cobra, plus more reptiles liberated from the store, to avenge himself against those who have treated him badly.
Shaw Brothers horror at its sleazy best
A bloody-mouthed lizard
Unlike Willard (1971), however, which this film is obviously inspired by, Zhihong is a far more disturbed protagonist compared to the rat-obsessed main character in the American original. In a scene where Zhihong carries a prostitute who’d tried to mug him back to his shack, The Killer Snakes queasily merges Zhihong’s desire to get back at his tormentors with his disturbed sexual urges, showing him take advantage of the woman by tying her up and licking her. Though Zhihong himself has been a victim of bullying, he does far worse, allowing his snake friends to violate his captive in a sweaty, seedy scene that uses black and white flashbacks to suggest Zhihong’s dark urges stem from childhood memories of abuse and voyeurism.
Zhihong allows his bondage fantasies to get out of hand
Starting with mondo-style footage of live snakes having their gall bladders cut out, this film is sordid and repellant in many ways, but it is well shot and lit, juggling its exploitative components expertly. Bondage fantasies, scenes of Zhihong letting monitor lizards scratch his latest tied-up female victim, a set piece involving an abusive character chopping up snakes for real with a sword before he’s constricted to death by a huge python, plus other grindhouse elements, show how this movie set its sights on offending and disturbing its viewers, a goal it obviously succeeded in achieving with sleazy ease.
Zhihong lets monitor lizards attack one of his captives
Directed by Titus Ho, starring Kent Tong, Poon Lai-Yin and Ga Lun.
A film crew sneaks into an off-limits burial place in Borneo, releasing a Red Dwarf ghost, triggering a murderous curse that will only be halted when a grey-haired sorcerer and a Buddhist Lama finally intervene.
Blu-ray slipcase artwork
This unashamedly exploitative release from Nikko International Productions & Films presents us with the typical Hong Kong horror movie staples of arcane rituals and chanting monks, mixing them into a salacious brew heavily indebted to western movies.
Sometimes the mask of the Red Dwarf ghost is superimposed over the image of its possessed victim
Scorpions swarm over a sorcerer!
Mondo footage of the slaughter of real pigs, a meddling documentary crew and the depiction of indigenous tribespeople as cruel savages hint at the influence of CANNIBAL HOLOCAUST, while a set piece involving main protagonist Stella being assaulted by a possessed bamboo bed that forces her legs wide open above an oil lamp is undoubtedly inspired by THE EVIL DEAD.
Stella is attacked by parts of her bamboo bed…
…and she’s forced by the bamboo poles to slowly lower downwards, towards a lit oil lamp
Let’s face it, if you’re interested in these kind of films, then this poster is definitely going to persuade you to watch it!
RED SPELL SPELLS RED is certainly full of incident. Memorable moments include the very gross spectacle of a Borneo tribesman eating the innards of a still-alive chicken, Stella’s possessed period blood provoking a supernatural incident, death-by-jungle-vines, people succumbing to scorpion infestations, and a finale in which the grey-haired holy man allows himself to be covered in scorpions and immolated.
Even leaves can be deadly in this film
Skewered on bamboo!
Scorpions go in for the kill!
A very Hong Kong-style exorcism ceremony!
Let’s just spare a moment to consider put-upon documentarian Stella (Lai-Yin), who finds herself in multiple situations that inevitably result in her clothes getting wet. She is also plagued with a Scorpion Spell that causes her to exude these black arthropods from a wound near a red birthmark, making her deadly to anyone who gets too close to her. Even when the helpful sorcerer is trying to cure her, this calls for the poor woman to be bound to a rotating water wheel (cue more wet clothing shots), then sprinkled with powder made from the ground-up skull of the sorcerer’s dead daughter, before having a chunk of possessed flesh ripped from her shoulder. This is definitely a location shoot Stella will want to forget!
Poon Lai-Yin, as Stella, has got wet clothing again!
As part of the exorcism process, Stella is strapped to a revolving water wheel…
…which means, of course, Stella gets really wet again!
All in all, RED SPELL SPELLS RED is a gonzo, shameless piece of brazen Hong Kong exploitation filmmaking that lovers of vulgar, mad & muddled mondo horror movies will love.
If you’ve no wish to see a live chicken eaten by a dude, don’t watch this film!
Directed by William Cheung Kei, produced by Tsai-Ching Wang and starring Yun-Peng Hsiang, Yuen Kao, Ping-Ou Wei and Lui Cheung.
An unscrupulous businessman orders his workers to kill loads of snakes infesting a construction site. After a new apartment complex is built there, thousands of snakes return and attack the building’s occupants to get their revenge.
Poster
This Hong Kong-Taiwanese movie features the killing of lots of live snakes and unashamedly shows the deaths in loving detail, so be warned before you decide to give CALAMITY OF SNAKES a watch. If you can stomach these mondo moments of real-life reptile butchery, then the movie certainly delivers on its promise of multiple moments of snake-attack mayhem!
Killed in the bath!
The film starts as it means to go on, with the slaying of various species of snake infesting a pit during the building of a new apartment development in Taiwan, owned by Mr Chang. Ignoring the protests of his architect, Chang refuses to deal with them humanely, ordering his workers to splat the serpents with shovels instead. Chang himself gets in on the act by using a digger to dice more snakes.
Continuing this theme of snake-related nastiness, we then see a live snake being slit open and skinned alive for its bladder at a market. Not too long after this, the snakes start to strike back, as foreseen by Chang’s superstitious wife, beginning with an attack on a construction worker and a call girl… as they have sex!
The film lives up to the promotional artwork for once
Attempting to deter any further snake assaults, Chang’s geeky righthand man employs the services of a snake expert, who sprinkles a powdery concoction of cement, tobacco and sulphur around the place because “all snakes fear these things”. After a rainstorm washes away the powder, the snakes return, so Chang uses mongooses to deal with some of the serpents.
The director obviously believed viewers really, really wanted to watch a lot of mongoose vs snake action, because he presents us with an extended series of close-up mammals-murdering-reptiles shots. This sequence just goes on and on!
It doesn’t end well for many characters in this movie
Realising that he needs more than mongooses, Chang calls in a snake-hunting master, a dude with white eyebrows, who we first see performing some kind of stage show, pulling a snake from his mouth and allowing it to bite his tongue. It is theorised that a boa is influencing the other snakes to attack en masse, so the master sets out to kill it.
Big boss snake
In an over the top confrontation in a storage building, the master fights the large boa, which bites off some of his fingers, leaps about energetically and roars! This is an enjoyably kinetic, fast-moving scene, shot like a kung fu fight, that sees the master use a rope to finally strangle the big snake. The master leaves, assuming his job is done… but it’s shown that there’s another boa lurking around.
Master versus the boa!
The focus of the movie shifts to the newly opened apartment building now, where we are introduced to various characters, including rich, old guys, a precocious child, and a large lady who loves her food. These stock characters, plus more scenes involving the cost-cutting boss and the idealistic architect, give CALAMITY OF SNAKES a vibe reminiscent of 70s disaster movies.
VHS sleeve
There are some incredibly lowbrow comic moments added to the cheesy mix, including a scene where speeded-up footage of the overweight woman eating too much food is intercut with shots of a pig with its snout in a trough, though there fortunately aren’t too many of these ‘funny’ scenes!
The snakes attack everyone in the apartment complex
When snakes start flying up out of the building’s basement level and begin to infest the complex, slithering into lifts and overflowing into lobbies and bedrooms, the actors are soon rolling around the place, with loads of real, writhing snakes crawling over their bodies and faces. The snakes in this movie are obviously treated badly, but the actors don’t fare much better, as an endless flood of real reptiles are hurled at them! I do hope these thespians were paid well enough!
Covered in snakes!
There are a lot of snakes used during this finale, and I do mean a LOT! Entire corridors are deluged with slithering serpents. There are snakes in punchbowls, snakes in the bath, snakes on the reception desk and a tsunami of snakes that spill from a lift!
Snakes in the foyer
Chang, at one point, grabs a samurai sword and the movie treats us to a sequence featuring the slo-mo hacking of snakes, complete with close-ups of the various portions of the decapitated reptiles twitching on the floor.
Snake on the face!
The fire department is eventually called and dudes in snazzy silver boots & helmets come to the rescue, chopping up snakes with fire axes and spraying them with extinguishers. But even the firemen have trouble dealing the second big, roaring boa, forcing them to resort to using flamethrowers! This, of course, gives the filmmakers the excuse to now present us with a multitude of shots of snakes being burned alive.
Flamethrowers!
The boss boa is no pushover, however, especially as it fights like a martial arts master! The critter flies around the rooms, slapping away people with its coils (cue loud, kung fu-style punching noises) and it even hurls a large eagle statue and a drum kit at the firemen, then agilely leaps away from their flamethrowers!
The big puppet beast is finally set alight, whereupon it wraps itself around Chang, then constricts him and immolates him at the same time!
The big boa and nasty Mr Chang both go up in flames
CALAMITY OF SNAKES is an unashamedly exploitative, schlocky, infamous extravaganza that comes across like a mad animals-attack genre film infused with 70s disaster flick trimmings. If you can withstand the many, many mondo shots of snake snuff footage hurled at your retinas (which is kind of hard to do), this is a dumb, fun, subtlety-free, unhinged, revolting-yet-watchable, one-of-a-kind creature feature that you’re not likely to forget in a hurry (for various reasons!)
Ghost girl prepares to stick her hand through the heroine’s body!
This Hong Kong horror flick was directed (and written) by Dickson To, stars Gigi Lai, Anthony Wong, Shirley Cheung and Law Lan, and was produced by Wong Jing.
Spirit child!
Journalist Gigi (Lai) goes back to her family home in Hong Kong’s Yuen Long District with her cop husband Fai (Wong), to help her mom (Lan) and sister (Cheung) deal with various problems, including hauntings and several attempted acts of sabotage perpetrated by lowlifes working for Mr Chin, a shady businessman.
What is the origin of this wraith-child?
Starting out promisingly with a dead dog being strung up outside the mom’s home and a guy getting transfixed by a television aerial, the movie unfortunately soon becomes a rather pedestrian, underachieving affair, lacking suspense or any sense of dread. The plot seems content to plod along with scenes of Gigi and Fai’s easy-going, unexceptional marital life, interspersed with the occasional glimpse of a creepy kid or similar underwhelming incident.
One of Mr Chin’s hired goons gets skewered on a TV aerialGigi Lai plays Gigi
Gigi becomes increasingly concerned about what is happening at the family home and is given various snippets of advice and pearls of occult wisdom by one of her work colleagues, Uncle Ming, which includes his theory that the weird phone calls she’s been getting in the middle of the night are from ghosts that are ‘on the same frequency’ as Gigi.
Blue-lit, pimple-faced spirit-dude
Events become stranger when Fai’s soul is trapped in an endless Mahjong game and the ghostly young girl becomes more of an ongoing presence at the property. Gigi, with the help of Uncle Ming, eventually gets to the bottom of what is happening, after her mute mom’s soul is released from her body (thanks to the application of electricity!) so that she can explain everything. The mother’s soul reminds Gigi that she’d had an abortion several years earlier… and the spectral girl is actually her unborn daughter’s spirit, which is causing Fai and Gigi’s sister Fen to become possessed by other ghosts.
DVD cover
Gigi allows the ghostly girl to stick her hand right through her body, but this doesn’t happen in reality, and Gigi’s willingness to sacrifice herself placates her aborted daughter’s angry spirit. Now Gigi teams-up with her wraith daughter in an attempt to extricate Fai’s soul from the ongoing ghostly Mahjong game…
Gigi allows the ghost of her unborn daughter to shove her hand into her belly…
…and the girl spirit’s hand splats out of Gigi’s back!
HAUNTED MANSION does improve towards the end, but it suffers overall from poor plotting choices, including sidelining Anthony Wong’s interesting, slightly loutish & clumsy character for a large chunk of the second half of the movie, and never explaining the reason why Mr Chin, the businessman villain, is so desperate to get hold of the property that he’s willing to kill for it. There’s a jarring shift in tone, too, when the film momentarily veers into Cat III territory, as Mr Chin’s wife gets stripped and assaulted in their office by an unseen entity. Chin is then attacked and strangled by the possessed wife, leaving his whole subplot hanging.
A couple of the paper cut-out figures from the mansion’s shrine move about somehow…
A decent moment involves the blue-lit, long-nailed ghost girl jumping onto the back of one of Mr Chin’s minions when he attempts to burn down the house, plus there are a couple of scenes featuring cut-out figurines from the mansion’s elaborate shrine that seem to move around of their own volition, though this cool concept is soon forgotten, which is a shame, as they added a novel visual aspect to the story.
The girl-spectre rides on the back of the would-be arsonist!
Judas, an envoy of Satan, prepares to remove a victim’s heart
Officer Ching (Chingmy Yau), who works for the police complaints division, is investigating Nam (Donnie Yen) to decide if he is mentally fit to carry out his police duties, but she is asked to team-up with Nam instead, to help investigate a serial killer case.
Donnie Yen needed to be in more of this!
This murderer is not just some typical killer, however. He is called Judas (played in a full-on fashion by Francis Ng), he’s an envoy of Satan and he’s trying to track down the Devil’s Daughter, who he claims is a woman born at 6 am on 6th June, 1969. To test if a woman is, indeed, the devil’s offspring, Judas ties his female victims to a cross and surgically removes their hearts: if one of them doesn’t die after this procedure she will be proven to be the true one. Though most of what happens is merely suggested, we do see Judas take a bite out of his latest victim’s removed heart.
Some scenes are well enough shot
Writer Jing Wong mixes too many comedy elements into the story, mainly centred around inept cop Ka-Ming (Chi Wah Wong), who is cowardly, terrible at surveillance work and a pathetic womaniser. Wong also inserts some throwaway dialogue about the impending Chinese takeover of Hong Kong into the movie, though this isn’t really gone into. He does put a certain amount of thought into how Judas locates his victims, revealing that Judas compels a woman working at a credit card company to divulge the details of all female customers born on 6th June, 1969 but, generally, Wing fails to keep the plot coherent and focused.
During an autopsy, the latest victim is reanimated to deliver a threat
With Ching starting to realise that she might actually be the daughter of Satan (she can compel people to hurt themselves by saying “go to hell”) and Judas continuing to madly claim that he’s doing the devil’s bidding, you expect the movie to kick up a gear and become more horror-oriented, but SATAN RETURNS remains unsure whether it’s a comedic police procedural, an action film or a supernatural story.
Donnie Yen and Chingmy Yau
Ultimately, though director Wai-Lun Lam handles the occasional blue-lit set piece with a certain amount of verve, the film fails to be tense, funny, scary or properly exciting.
After Judas kills some cops during the finale they are brought back as zombie killersA zombie cop grabs his own severed foot so that he can club Ka-Ming around the head with it!
It doesn’t help that Donnie Yen, playing a hardboiled cop who tends to punch first and ask questions later, is underutilised as Ning. He just should have been featured in the movie more, rather than the useless and irritating Ka-Ming. Though it is a case of too little, too late, the finale does treat us to the spectacle of Ning first brandishing a chainsaw, to cut down some reanimated cop-corpses, and then using a nail gun to pin Judas to a toppled-over cross… before the villain is immolated with a Molotov cocktail!
This movie should have been better!
Oh no: spoiler! Ching removes her own heart at the end and survives… so she is the Devil’s Daughter!
Devoted to every kind of movie and TV monster, from King Kong to Godzilla, from the Blob to Alien.